We have decided to go through state public adoption. There are so many needy babies/children. We had gone to one class the beginning of the summer, but it was more for state foster care not state adoption. We decided the best move would be to wait till the fall when we can get into the classes that are more focused on adoption. We still have a lot of questions. One being, Who can watch the child once he or she is placed into our custody?. These specific classes will be more what we need.
It seems so crazy, that it could all happen so fast! It's not the best for my "in charge" and "planned" personality. But, maybe it is exactly what I need. We should be approved by Thanksgiving, if not a little sooner. I can't even really fathom the posibility of having a child by Christmas! I know I have to plan for it to be a year away, sometimes we have to wait for good things. But, sometimes, just sometimes, I get a little carried away.
Next week we will finish the nursery. We need to finish mudding and sanding the room, and then do another coat of paint. I'm excited to have vacation so we can finish painting the mud room, the nursury, the outside of the house, and maybe the dresser. It will feel awesome to get it all done. Once it is done, I can't wait to start slowly putting things into it. One one hand, it is still getting ahead of myself. However, on the other hand, we need to be ready by the time we are approved.
I know this post is a bit "all over the place". However, I feel it is ok because I'm still trying to get it up to speed. :-)
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
foolishness
So, I realize this blog might be foolish, but I've wanted to do this for a long time. I wanted to capture my thoughts on this wild ride towards (and someday into) parenthood. I have wanted to be a mom forever. Well, as long as I can remember. When I was 16 I learned that it most likely would not be an easy journey, since I was diagnosed with Turner's Syndrome. This doesn't affect much for me, except say, oh, the ability to have children.
I remember feeling like I was "wierd" or a "misfit". I don't remember, however, feeling angry at the fact that I wouldn't conceive. I trusted that I could have kids whether miraculously through God, or adoption, or other fertility measures. As I grew up I doubted it would even matter, I didn't see myself getting married any time soon. Eventually I met my incredible husband, and mangaged to tell him the personal area of my life. We were married in May of 2008, and for a while we tossed around ideas of what we would do when we were ready to have children.
Eventually, that time came. We started down the very long road of IVF. In March of 2009 we started the testing that would lead to IVF. It was invasive and it was very hard to get an appointment. Things fell through. We reached the end of our affordable possibilities, and by May of 2010 we were ready to go through with Adoption instead.
It was a very hard transition. I had always been fine with adoption. I knew that was the best and most probable option for 13 years before this point. However, we had gotten the run around from the fertility place we were using, and I had gotten my hopes up. I had locked myself out of our house when the call from the fertility clinic came, and it was a rough afternoon for sure. Our anniversary none-the-less. I cried and pittied myself for a couple hours, and eventually came to the realization that GOD is good, and GOD is in control. He knows how I feel, and he placed this desire to be a mom inside me. I have FULL confidence now that God is directing all of this, even when I can't see it. This gives me peace. This is how I begin my blog, at the very beginning of the adoption process.
I remember feeling like I was "wierd" or a "misfit". I don't remember, however, feeling angry at the fact that I wouldn't conceive. I trusted that I could have kids whether miraculously through God, or adoption, or other fertility measures. As I grew up I doubted it would even matter, I didn't see myself getting married any time soon. Eventually I met my incredible husband, and mangaged to tell him the personal area of my life. We were married in May of 2008, and for a while we tossed around ideas of what we would do when we were ready to have children.
Eventually, that time came. We started down the very long road of IVF. In March of 2009 we started the testing that would lead to IVF. It was invasive and it was very hard to get an appointment. Things fell through. We reached the end of our affordable possibilities, and by May of 2010 we were ready to go through with Adoption instead.
It was a very hard transition. I had always been fine with adoption. I knew that was the best and most probable option for 13 years before this point. However, we had gotten the run around from the fertility place we were using, and I had gotten my hopes up. I had locked myself out of our house when the call from the fertility clinic came, and it was a rough afternoon for sure. Our anniversary none-the-less. I cried and pittied myself for a couple hours, and eventually came to the realization that GOD is good, and GOD is in control. He knows how I feel, and he placed this desire to be a mom inside me. I have FULL confidence now that God is directing all of this, even when I can't see it. This gives me peace. This is how I begin my blog, at the very beginning of the adoption process.
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